While reports coming in are still sketchy at best, word on the bricks was that the National Association of Mortgage Field Services (NAMFS) offices were breached by an angry mob of NAMFS Offender Members whom demanded that Eric Miller cease and desist his campaign advocating for the rights of Minority Females and Labor. The mob, accompanied by pitchforks and torches, were led by no less than Paul Williams, Foreclosurepedia Editor-in-Chief. In what might only be called an ironic twist of fate, first hand accounts coming in are that Williams has traded in his Anonymous mask for a suit and tie. Accompanied by lawyers, accountants and a special emissary from Russia, Williams led the pre dawn raid of the NAMFS Headquarters located at a non disclosed location in the quaint town of Stow, OH. Cheap Suit Jay Goscinski, the acting NAMFS Executive Director appointed in an emergency session of the Regime, had this to say,
It is madness what is going on. It looks like at approximately 5 am, Central Standard Time, Eric Miller had a Coming to Christ moment. He began leaking documents to WikiLeaks, going back nearly twenty years, documenting the atrocities committed against Minority Females and Labor which are now going viral on the Internet. Even @realDonaldTrump seems to have gotten in on the Twitter storms arguing that there was nothing to see here and everyone needed to keep moving along.
Like a scene reminiscent of the Arab Spring, by lunch, Eric Miller had hoisted himself to the rooftop waving a hand stitched, #BlackLivesMatter flag. Circling around the building, Williams was mounted atop a trailer of debris being used as a battering ram attempting to gain access to the inside of the NAMFS Headquarters. Scores of Safeguard Properties personnel were seen davening in the distance. Strangely, those Minority Females and Labor whom had been so brutalized over two decades of decadence and fraud were witnessed aimlessly wandering around like sheeple awaiting the slaughter. Fearing that this might be the beginning of the end for the assembly line, robo signing, foreclosure industry, bankers like Jamie Dimon, CEO of JPMorgan Chase, and other financial terrorists are spontaneously gathering all around the ruins of the once proud 74 square foot NAMFS Headquarters. The mood is somber as they all begin a community circle jerk offering the end results as an offering to the Federal Reserve God, Janet Yellen, whom is adding it into her brew for economic salvation. Even France’s current President, François Fillon, whom was recently questioned for sending texts during the French Presidential Debate, is rumored to have been secretly calling shots and attempting to curry favor with French expats in America.
As riots and clashes between the Gay Black Jewish Klansmen for Tolerance and Understanding began to spiral out of control as they took on the NAMFS Government Relations Committee members, the story is that the NAMFS GRC were attempting to salvage secret documents revealing Nickie Bigenho’s conspiracy to hide her company’s seedy involvement in misclassification of workers. Mortgage Contracting Services (MCS), has been using Minority Females and Labor as independent contractors knowing they were employees. Moreover, and more importantly, it appears that the Gay Black Jewish Klansmen for Tolerance have pulled out all the stops in their quest for victory. The photo at the right, obtained exclusively by Foreclosurepedia, shows Patrick Star and SpongeBob at the periphery of the photo. Many are saying that the late night activity at 124 Conch Street, Bikini Bottom, may have actually been related to today’s events and in fact, Gary the Snail has been feverishly meeting with journalists since the pre dawn raids began. We may actually be witnessing a Miller – Gay Black Jewish Klansman – Bikini Bottom trifecta emerging.
Foreclosurepedia will keep you updated with these unprecedented events as they continue to unfold. As our Editor-in-Chief appears to have crossed over to the Dark Side, we are offering that now open position to Eric Miller. As in all things, Foreclosurepedia wishes everyone a Happy April Fools Day. And remember, if you cannot poke fun at yourself, you have no business in the media. 😉